Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Conversations with a teen

By Teresa

Mom: (pauses tv, hears shuffling around in the fridge). "Nick, what are you doing in there?"


Mom: "Nick...what are you into?"

Nick: "Nothing.". (said in a mouth full, mumbly kind of way)

Mom: "what are you eating?"

Nick: "coke."

Mom: "since when do you have to chew coke?"

Monday, January 24, 2011

can I go to the nurse please?

by teresa

Katy called and needed me to pick up Kai from school today. She had a few too many kids and not enough car seats to make her going up there possible. I ran a few streets over to get him (after changing into something nice, applying makeup and fixing my hair). I could not walk into SRI (my old domain) looking like a shabby housewife who hadn't showered. I got to see all my old friends (secretaries, teachers, security guard and principal) and got lots of hugs, which made my day. I really miss the family atmosphere there. I went back to the nurses office where Kai was laying on a bed, lights down low. She and I walked over to him and asked how he was doing. He said his tummy still hurt. I asked if he had thrown up and he said, "no, but I did have chronic diarrhea". That cracked the nurse and I up. She said had she known it was a chronic situation, she would have called sooner.

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Questions and comments heard in the Green house this week

by teresa

There are vultures eating Shorty's bone in the backyard!
I hope you mean the steak bone I gave him.

I don't want to freeze my bahiggy's off.

No wonder these pillows smell like nuts sometimes.

Do you want me to make them feel better?

I got a stupid fever blister cause I don't like my boobs touched by strangers.

You're all up in my crack.

Mom, if you get any shorter they might give you your own show on TLC called "Little Mommas".

Just eat your meat and be happy!

Guess Nook took my nooky.

Put your gloves on and come to bed.

When you take him for his haircut make sure to ask for the non Moe trim.

One minute your Farmvilling and the next your dead.

I like snuggling with a snack bar supervisor.

Honey....did you break the bed?

Thursday, January 13, 2011

I hope I don't get gassy when I'm there...you know how I get when I'm nervous

By Teresa
Going to my first mammogram appointment today.
I'm kinda nervous, as I am doing anything new and unknown.
I even woke up with a fever blister...dang.
I will be so glad when this is over and I can check it off my list.
Chris has been pestering me since September (I turned 40) to get this done.
I wonder if I would have to remind him, if the shoe were on the other foot?

Monday, January 10, 2011

If winning isn't everything, why do they keep score?

by teresa
Sports and kids are and interesting combination.
Sometimes exhilarating, sometimes frustrating and sometimes down right heart attack inducing.
With three kids in our house who have played five different sports (yes, cheering counts as a sport), we have been through a spectrum of emotions. You start out with high hopes of shooting, stealing, scoring, etc. You quickly learn that your kids motivations are much different than yours. They are there for social time and snack time. Before the first whistle even blows they are wanting to know what the after game snack is going to be. I not only have my own children to cheer on, but have had the privilege of watching my oldest nieces and nephew pick flowers in a field (play soccer). This week Kaden (age 5) played her first basketball game. She is built like an athlete, has a daddy for a coach and looks adorable in the uniform. What else do you need? During pregame warm ups she was smiling, participating and waving to us. Once the whistle blew for the game to begin she freaked out. I know it is just about the most frustrating thing for a parent to go through...but for an aunt...it's hilarious to watch. What? I've been there, done that. Now it's time for me to giggle and point like all those older parents did to me when I was in tears as Nick was grabbing my leg and screaming that I wouldn't go out on the field with him. She did end up out on the court for a few minutes, but never let go of her daddy's leg (yes, he was on the court with her). hahahaha
Oh the joys parenting!

Pic. #1
Daddy Josh and Kaden running out on the court as their team name is announced!
Pic. #2
Kaden looking over at me with a smile, excited for her game.
Pic. #3
Josh getting them lined up, ready for game to begin
Pic. #4
Ben consoling Kaden who was sobbing on the bench after the whistle blew
Pic. #5
Kaden in the game, Josh trying to pry her hands off his pants legs

Friday, January 07, 2011

"It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live, remember that." Albus Dumbledore

by teresa
Last night I babysat for Vin, who is now 3 and 1/2 months. I have not spent as much time with him as my other nieces and nephews, since he doesn't live next door like they did. So I thought this would be a good chance to sit down with him one on one and impart a little aunt wisdom and guidance. I wanted to teach him about love, courage, victory of good over evil, loyalty, sacrifice and selflessness. We had a good chat and in the end, I think he was all the better for it.

Thursday, January 06, 2011

Some folks are wise, and some are otherwise

By Teresa

I did a Really stupid thing the other day. I'm sure it's something I should have known, especially at my age. But alas, forty doesn't necessarily mean your a walking google (answers for every question).
Everyone had left for school and I was cleaning the kitchen. Scraping breakfast bits off dishes and wiping off the counters. I loaded the dishwasher and reached for a cascade gel ball to stick it so I could get the load running and move on to making beds, folding laundry and head to the grocery store. The cascade bag was empty. Crud! I really wanted to get these dishes done....so I reached for my dish soap. Maybe I could just put a bit of a squirt in the little cleaner compartment and it would be good enough? So I did. I set it...and went on to finish my list of to do's. About an hour later I was upstairs putting away clothes in Ben's room when Shorty came upstairs to spy on me (he follows me from room to room most days). I glanced over at him and screamed. He was covered in something. Something white. It was flinging all over the carpet as he shook himself beside me. Omg!!! It was bubbles!
I ran downstairs and found out where he had been bathing....the kitchen. I had stuck his food bowl in front of the dishwasher and that knucklehead dog had stood there chowing down as our maytag spurt out foam all over his head (and the entire floor). Hahahahahahaha
I laughed till my sides hurt while I mopped up the floor and dried off Shortman before anyone came home to find out the dumb thing I had done. I must keep up appearances of perfection at all times. Lol.
I added cascade to my grocery list and pulled out all the dishes and rinsed them thoroughly before reloading the washer to be run after my trip to the store.
Oh well, you live and learn.
On the upside....my kitchen floor has never looked so good!

Wednesday, January 05, 2011

he needs his rabies and his "I'm too lazy to walk outside so I will just pee on the floor" shots

by teresa

Taking Shorty to the vet this morning.
I think he knows something up.
I just found him hiding in the shower.
too funny!

Add on:
Shorty did great, although he did freak out and shed most of his fur off on me.
Funny thing happened on the way home. One of those tiny yippy dogs jumped out of the window of the car driving in front of me. The driver flipped out and came to a Dukes of Hazzard stop right on Indian River Road. She leapt out of the still running car and started chasing after the dog. It was insane. I felt bad for her and almost turned around further down the road to stop and help. Then I remembered that this was the same road Chris uses to drive to and from work. And if he drove by and saw me darting in and out of traffic he may just take me to get a rabies shot too.

Saturday, January 01, 2011

Questions and comments heard in the Green house in December

By Teresa

I got a brand new pair of roller-skates you got a brand new key

Go repent for those potatoes!
The devil made me put pumpkin in it

Stop screaming...I can't drive when you're screaming!
We can't help it...we thought we were going to die.

We pulled up to church and the cops were pulling a guy out of the bushes.

How come the two times a year I crave a powdered donut I happen to have on a black shirt?

The cashier at walmart sprayed me with diet coke.

Are you gelling?

Don't hit the old lady!!!

Hey, look at that cloud. Isn't it very pretty and cloudish?

Y'all are not allowed in the bathroom at the same time...bad things happen!

Come on...somebody even ate half the grizzle.

Did she break her face off?

Why am I always black in here?

He's not homeless, he just waited on me at wendys last week.

Just call us the spaghetti bandits.